Chapter 16 - Mia Asked the Question Gavin Had FearedShe was seven when it happened.
No therapist.
No planned conversation.
Just a red light.
Gavin driving her home from school.
Mia asked:
“Is Uncle Reid my real dad?”
His hands tightened on the steering wheel.
He pulled into a parking lot.
Turned around.
“Why are you asking?”
“A girl at school said her mom heard it.”
Gavin felt anger toward strangers.
Then stopped.
That anger would not help Mia.
He called Dr. Marks.
Her advice was simple:
Do not lie. Do not give more detail than she asks.
Gavin returned to the back seat.
Mia watched him.
“Is he?”
Gavin took a breath.
“Reid is your biological father.”
She frowned.
“What does biological mean?”
“He helped make your body.”
Mia stared.
“You didn’t?”
Gavin’s chest broke open.
“I have been your dad every day since you were born.”
“But did you make me?”
“No.”
Her eyes filled.
“Then you’re not my real dad.”
Gavin moved closer.
“Okay.”
She looked confused.
“You’re not going to say I’m wrong?”
“Not while you’re scared.”
Mia cried.
“What are you?”
“The man who was there when you were born.”
She listened.
“The man who changed your diapers badly.”
A tiny smile.
“The man you threw applesauce at.”
“I was a baby.”
“Still rude.”
She laughed through tears.
“The man who stayed up when you had pneumonia.”
“Dad.”
“Yes.”
“The man who came in the kitchen.”
Gavin swallowed.
“Yes.”
Mia leaned into him.
“Can I have two dads?”
He almost answered too quickly.
Then stopped.
“You can decide what words feel right over time.”
“Does Reid know?”
“Yes.”
“Does he want me?”
Gavin felt pain for Reid.
“Yes.”
“Then why doesn’t he come?”
“Because wanting you is not the same as getting to decide.”
Mia thought.
“Do I decide?”
“Some things. Slowly. With adults helping.”
“Did Mom know?”
“Yes.”
“She lied?”
“Yes.”
Mia looked away.
“Did Darlene know?”
“Yes.”
Then her face changed.
“Is that why she did the dog food?”
Gavin felt sick.
“No.”
“But the secret was me.”
“The secret involved how you were born.”
He took her hands.
“You did not cause Mom’s affair.”
“What’s affair?”
Gavin stopped.
“Mom broke a relationship promise with Reid.”
“Oh.”
“You did not cause the test.”
Mia listened.
“You did not cause Darlene asking for money.”
“You did not cause what happened in the kitchen.”
Tears streamed down her face.
“Everybody knew stuff about me except me.”
There.
The deepest injury.
Ownership.
Adults had turned her beginning into a secret they managed around her.
Gavin pulled her close.
“I’m sorry.”
“Why?”
“Because adults let your story become something you had to be afraid of.”
She leaned against him.
“Do I have to see Reid?”
“No.”
“Can I?”
“Someday.”
“Not today.”
“Not today.”
Audrey learned later.
She cried.
Then asked to speak with Mia under Dr. Marks’s supervision.
Mia asked:
“Why didn't you tell Dad?”
Audrey answered:
“I was afraid.”
Mia’s face tightened.
“You’re always afraid.”
Audrey froze.
Then nodded.
“Yes.”
“And then everybody else gets scared.”
Audrey started crying.
“Yes.”
Mia did not hug her.
Good.
Audrey continued:
“I should have carried my own fear.”
Mia looked at Dr. Marks.
Then back.
“Did you love Dad?”
“Yes.”
“Then why did you break the promise?”
Audrey swallowed.
“Because loving someone doesn’t make me incapable of selfish choices.”
Mia sighed.
“Adults are stupid.”
Audrey laughed through tears.
“Yes.”
That conversation did not fix anything.
May you like
But it gave Mia something adults had denied her for years.
An answer that belonged to reality.
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