Chapter 23 - Zoey DecidesAt twelve, Zoey asked about seeing Derek.
Renee had prepared for the opposite.
She almost said no.
Then stopped.
This was the moment every therapist had warned about.
Do not make your fear become the child’s cage.
“Why now?”
Zoey shrugged.
“I want to know what he looks like.”
“You know what he looks like.”
“Now.”
Derek had several years remaining on his sentence.
Any contact would be structured, supervised, and subject to professional guidance.
Renee hated the idea.
Zoey noticed.
“You don’t want me to.”
“I’m scared.”
“Of him?”
“Yes.”
“For me?”
“Yes.”
Zoey nodded.
“That’s okay.”
The roles nearly reversed.
Renee stopped it.
“You do not have to take care of my fear.”
“I know.”
They spoke to Zoey’s therapist.
Then Daniel.
Then appropriate corrections staff.
Eventually a remote supervised video meeting was arranged.
No physical visit.
Thirty minutes maximum.
Zoey sat beside her therapist.
Renee waited outside.
She could not hear.
After twenty-two minutes, the door opened.
Zoey came out.
Renee stood.
“How was it?”
“Weird.”
“Do you want to talk?”
“Not yet.”
They drove home.
Hours later Zoey entered Renee’s bedroom.
“He looks older.”
“Okay.”
“He cried.”
Renee waited.
“He said sorry again.”
“Okay.”
“I asked why.”
“What did he say?”
Zoey sat on the bed.
“He said he kept thinking one more lie would fix the lie before it.”
Renee’s chest tightened.
That was Derek.
More accurate than any diagnosis.
“What did you say?”
“I said that’s dumb.”
Renee almost laughed.
“And?”
“He said yes.”
Zoey looked confused.
“I liked that he didn’t argue.”
Renee nodded.
“Do you want another call?”
“I don’t know.”
“Okay.”
Months passed.
No pressure from Derek.
Zoey eventually requested another.
Then none for almost a year.
The relationship existed on her terms.
That did not make it healed.
It made it bounded.
Derek’s parental role would never return automatically.
Trust would never be assumed.
But Zoey had stopped needing him to remain frozen as the man at the lake.
She could decide what information she wanted.
What contact.
May you like
What distance.
That was power Derek once tried to take.
